Thursday, January 31, 2013

Review: I Fucked the Mummy

Title: I Fucked the Mummy
Author: Delilah Fawkes
Source: Reviewer Purchser
Blurb: When Egyptologist, Layla, accidentally opens a hidden chamber inside of the dig site, she knows she's made a huge discovery. But when she's trapped inside with a sarcophagus, and the giant golden phallus mounted on top of it, she knows she's in huge trouble.
Warning: This 4200 word story contains ancient dildos, dusty undead gods, and an ending you won't soon forget!
Buy this book:Attack of the Monster Cocks! (Monster Sex Bundle) (the individual books are only available through Smashwords)

Lola's Thoughts: Contains Spoilers

Layla is having a restless night. The funding for the dig she is on has been pulled and they must leave the next day. She knows there is something in that tomb. So being the go getter that she is so goes to find out what is down deep in the tomb. She enters the room with the Egyptian penises all over the wall and blows on them. What do you know. You blow on the Egyptian penis glyphs and they start to glow. Fabulous. After much lead up and foreplay a door opens. Layla being the brave girl that she is goes into that tunnel. She enters a room with a sarcophagi in it. It's a beaut...complete with the Pharaohs face, rock hard body and a 3D golden dildo carved in the front. 

Monday, January 28, 2013

The Story of Rachel: Book I. Tales of Pandora

Author:  K.D. McKlean

Blurb:Rachel Collins is praying. And not for world peace. Thirty six years old and single, her prayer is self-centered. "Kill me now, Lord," she pleads during her latest attempt to meet Mr. Right via the internet.

She’s not hoping for a billionaire or even a millionaire, just a guy who can strike a spark to her tinder! Is she asking too much? She's a great gal! Just ask her parents! She might be a bit naive about some things, but capable enough- she's a correspondent for a major magazine, after all. So there!

On assignment she meets Michael, 42 years old, also a writer. The attraction is immediate and intense. Rachel, who sees vanilla as only a baking ingredient, enchants him. Michael can whip up some pretty hot delights himself, outside of the kitchen. He introduces a curious Rachel to powerful experiences of sensuality. Her Ladylike sense of propriety engages in a running battle with her now sparked Tinderbox desires.
Michael is an excellent cook and knows how to turn up the heat. Sampling the flavors offered, Rachel experiences humorous hiccups. On a date, Michael ramps up the risqué, resulting in a memorable skirt swirling salsa dance. Rachel's "What the hell, I ain't getting any younger" attitude spurs Michael to take her to the exclusive, adults only club Pandora's. Here, Rachel witnesses even more variations of earthly delights, and begins a lifelong friendship with another guest.

Michael is a realist, convinced that within 90 days, his affair with Rachel will be but another painful memory of loss. He is neither willing nor able to yell 'Geronimo' and fall for her. He can't, and that's that.

Maybe he should just get a damn dog.

This modern, urban, grown up love story is a recipe –three cups romance and one cup of slapdash humor. Blend in spices of eroticism, and beat until smooth.